Goals: Looking Back and Moving Forward

Well, tomorrow is my birthday and then it’s New Year’s Eve, so it’s time for me to set goals to smash.  I am a major goals person.  I am always setting, evaluating, and amending goals.  It’s okay for your goals to change over the time you set for them.  Sometimes priorities change and we realize something isn’t all that important to us anymore.

At the beginning of 2017, I set 7 goals.  Now, I share with you what they were and how I did this year.

Reach 120 pounds.  120 has been my goal weight for years now, because that’s about what I weighed before I had children.  I once again did not reach it.  I could give you all the excuses – I moved, I made a bunch of life changes, blah blah blah – but they would still be excuses.  If you don’t get rid of excuses, you can’t make body changes – period.  I did drop a few pounds, so at least I don’t have as far to go now!

Reach profitability with RGR.  Rhonda Gail Resale is my resale shop, which operates primarily on Poshmark.  I shifted focus in the spring, but still reached a point that it is all profit now!

Journal daily.  I started 2017 with a fresh bullet journal and I have used it all but maybe 5 days the entire year, so I will mostly call that a win!

Set a wedding date.  Oh, we set it alright.  Then we pushed it back and don’t have a solid date yet.  You’ll hear more about this later.

Grow hair past my shoulders.  It looks awful at the ends because I’m past do for a hair appointment, but it’s there at least – just barely!

Return to ASU.  I have literally one class to finish to have my bachelor’s degree and I intended to at least get enrolled again in 2017.  It just didn’t happen, due to financial reasons, such as we moved into a house instead of paying my school bills.

Blog biweekly.  As you will know if you have been reading here all year, this has been a success.  Actually, when I first made these goals, this blog didn’t exist just yet, but I was blogging regularly on the blog I had before this one.

I am pleased with what I did in 2017.  I did a LOT of things that I  had not originally planned for and I can’t be mad at that!  Now, to take a look at what I am planning for 2018.  This time, I took a tracking approach to my goals, to ensure that I have a way to check progress as I go.

 

Weight: 120.  Not only am I more determined than ever to get there, but I am pushing myself to do it by April 2, so that I don’t have the relaxed attitude of “eh, it’s only May, so the year isn’t over.”  Besides, I want to be a hot bride.

Rank: Royal.  This pertains to my Senegence business, in which I hope to do many things this year, but the rank gives me something I can easily track.

Launch my boutique.  I am opening a boutique this year and have simplified the remaining steps I have in order to track my progress in launching.

Get married!  Now we have to decide how big (how small is more accurate) this wedding will be and choose a venue.  And I should probably actually finalize my divorce.  Then, we are just going to go for it.

Take my side gig to Peter Anderson Festival.   I am doing marketing and social media for a friend’s business and we want to take the business to a popular arts festival.  Again, simplified the steps to track my progress.

There you have it, guys.  My timely and realistic goals.  I am set up and ready to tackle 2018!  Do you have things you’re excited to accomplish in the new year?

 

Melodramatic Birthday Post – Ashley

You guys – it’s Spring. I always say this time of year (March to the beginning of May) is like another Christmas season. There are sooo many birthdays and then throw in Mother’s Day to end the whole shabang. So I’m here to finally talk about my little birthday that occurred last week…and do some rambling….hope you’re all in on this one.  😉

Ok, so… let’s talk about 32. My birthday was last week. Last Tuesday – at 10pm I officially turned thirty-two years old. Honestly, I haven’t even given the number much thought. Yeah, I definitely feel like I’ve reached the point where I wouldn’t mind being able to stop time for a little while. You know – stay young longer. I’ve noticed differences in my body and mindset due to aging. Generally though – I’m at peace with my age. So, why am I here blabbing on and one about it? Well I did want to take some time to reflect. Think about where I’ve been … and where I want to be. I’ve always been the type of person that lived more in the future. I always look forward to where I’m going, what type of person I’ll be in ‘x’ amount of months or years… And overall, I’m really happy with where I am now. In this 32 year old life of mine. 😉

I made the comment the other day that I really wish I knew as much about taking care of my body and had the confidence in myself that I do now when I was younger. I am and always have been a super quiet and shy person. I think I’ve mentioned before how I’m socially awkward…not just in person. Ask Rhonda. It even takes a lot for me to interact virtually…. BUT I’ve come such a long way. My highschool and twenty something self didn’t think much of herself much less take any extra time to take care of her mind and body.

Weight was always an issue that I struggled with. The size of my body was something that always made me feel inferior, not attractive, not worth getting to know. I think it is so great now that there are plus sized super models or just plus sized celebrities and public figures who are letting it be known that size does not determine beauty of self worth. I try to flood my social media timelines with women like this. Women who are larger than average, and who are so so confident in themselves. I try to make a conscious effort to compliment my children – not just on their physical appearance. I try to say things like “ Oh my god…you are sooooo cute… and such a sweet baby.” I encourage my son to interact with other children. When he approaches other kids at the park and they don’t want to play with him. Of course, he comes running back to me. I tell him, “That’s ok. Find someone else to play with.” I try to teach him and demonstrate to him that rejection stings but we can move on from that. I want my daughter to be confident in her body and not afraid to wear whatever she wants. I want my son to be confident in his body and to not be afraid to wear whatever the hell he wants. I don’t want them to doubt themselves. I don’t want them to be afraid to make new friends or approach new people – because they worry about the reaction they will receive.  Because I lived that way for so long. I still struggle with that. I’m working on it. And I’ll keep working on it. 😉

Over the past 3 years I’ve made major changes in the way I eat and think about food. I lost a ton of weight….gained some back during and after being pregnant with Sophie…and am now back – less those extra pounds. Rhonda introduced me to the NSNG (No Sugar No Grains) Lifestyle that was coined, preached, and demonstrated by Vinnie Tortorich. Eating clean. Cutting out the majority of the sugar and grains in my diet. Those things have made me a physically and mentally healthier person. I know that it has made me a better mom. When you cut the crap out from  your diet, you don’t have to worry so much about the amount that you eat. You don’t have to restrict yourself to teeny tiny meals in the hopes of losing a few pounds. AND you don’t just lose weight. You gain healthier hair, nails, skin, mental clarity, energy, and on and on and on. Something else really important that I gained? Confidence in myself. Confidence in my body. Confidence that does not hinge on someone else’s opinion of me. Confidence that is due to my new opinion of myself.

I can look back … ten … or even fifteen years ago – and where I am now? That’s not where I thought I’d be. But you know, I’m ok with that. I had this disillusioned idea of what I thought life should look like at 32. And for a long time – those aspirations and goals that I set when I was a teenager – the fact that I hadn’t gotten to or reached those goals used to really haunt me. It used to make me feel … like I hadn’t accomplished anything   at all. Which is complete crap. I’ve accomplished a lot. Because listen. It’s ok to change your path. It’s ok to quit something that no longer holds any meaning for you. It’s ok to change your mind. I am a better person now. I’m not perfect. I still have a lot of work to do. BUT I am thankful the place I am at. 🙂 For me, feeling accomplished is no longer about marking off big achievements or reaching momentous goals. It’s not about having a list of things that I can say “LOOK at all the things I’ve checked off!!”. For me I try to feel accomplished in my every day. I look to my future with anticipation and excitement for things to come; however, I relish the here and now. I focus on the people in my life. I think about what can I do in the next few minutes to make something happen. I want to “Be here, now.” I don’t want to look back and think…. I wish I would have enjoyed that moment more…while it was happening.

I think 32 is going to be great. I don’t wake up with any dread of what I may face that day. My family is healthy and happy…and so am I. I really like my daytime job, and I am so happy to have this little blog space that I get to share with my best friend. I am so grateful that each of you come by to check in on us…see what we have to say. 🙂 I’m excited for our future, but I’m loving this. This right here. This moment. :):)