Eat Happy: Cauliflower Pizza Crust


Hi there.  Welcome back! We’re doing a weekly series (that was publishing every Tuesday and has moved to Thursdays) wherein we are cooking through one of our FAVE cookbooks : Eat Happy! If you missed the intro post you can click on over here to read that.

We started with the very first recipe and are working our way all the way through to the end. We will not be sharing with you the actual recipes that we cook. We WILL be sharing our experience during the whole process and our opinion of the outcome. So thanks for stopping by…and let’s dive in to this week’s recipe shall we?


When I ended up being assigned the Cauliflower Pizza Crust, I admit I was not excited.  Making my own crust has never been appealing to me in the first place, which is why I either skip pizza or buy a ready-made Mikey’s crust.  However, this entire series is about trying new things, so I dove in…and by dove in, I mean whined and agonized over the fact that I needed to buy and food-process cauliflower and squeeze out all the moisture.

I don’t own a food processor and my Ninja blender typically does just fine.  however, it didn’t quite get the cauliflower to the texture it called for.  I forged ahead anyway.

My favorite part of the process was sipping Tito’s as the kids and I gagged over the putrid smell of cauliflower cooking.  ACK.  This is the point where I said it smelled like ass, rotten ass, and Quentin stated, “and rotten ass is the worst ass.”

I knew I didn’t get enough of the moisture out when it just wouldn’t really bind together.  As I was mixing the dough with my hands, I could fell water squishing.  Oops.

I had forgotten to buy traditional pizza toppings, which I prefer to use when I am trying a new crust.  However, I went ahead and used leftover roast and some BBQ sauce.

I gotta say, the texture was all wrong, as in it fell the fuck apart and was chunky (yay for not pulsing enough and having too much water), but it didn’t taste bad.  It did taste like cauliflower because, you know, that’s like 80% of the content.  I won’t make it again (unless manufacturers start making cauliflower dust in the freezer section), but I can almost see why people eat it.