A Drinking Problem

This week I gave in and decided to hop on the bandwagon that is sarahah.  For those of you who somehow haven’t seen this on social media, it’s a website and app that allow you to receive anonymous comments from your friends or coworkers.  They are supposed to be “constructive.”  I started one, completely expecting to receive some hate mail.  I am not always the most loved person.

Anyway, it was lovely and full of kindness and even a secret admirer… until it got to the point that three people (and as I type this, I see another one has surfaced) had mentioned my drinking.

Now hold up one damn minute.  Drinking problem?  I take this really really fucking seriously.  As the daughter of an alcoholic, I have seen some shit and I KNOW what alcoholism is.  I have spent my entire adult life with the awareness that children of alcoholics run the risk of exhibiting the behaviors themselves.  I?  Do not have a drinking problem.

Let me break this shit down for you.

Alcoholism is often hidden behind closed doors.  It is not a bunch of wine and tequila selfies on social media.

Alcoholism is waking up thinking about when you can have a drink.  It is not having a cocktail every evening.

Alcoholism is frequently having relationship problems when drinking.  It is not having a good time with your family and friends, drinks in hand.

I could go on and on.  Quite frankly, I don’t have to fucking explain myself to anybody I don’t live with.  The reason I am so angry about this is that there are people with a TRUE ALCOHOL PROBLEM and this really makes it sound like every person who enjoys alcohol has a damn “problem.”

Listen, I love alcohol.  I really do.  Particularly, I love craft beer, a good bottle of wine, Tito’s vodka, and good agave tequila.  If I was an alcoholic and showed up to a party where there was only Bud Light to drink, I would drink it.  But no – fuck that shit.  If that’s all there is, pass me the water.  This is because I like the TASTE of good libations.  I mean, of course the way it makes me feel is for sure a bonus.

Here’s what you need to know if you are truly concerned and not just jealous and bitter that I do what the fuck I want:

I drink 6-7 nights a week on average.  Sometimes it’s one drink, sometimes it’s a bottle of wine (which if you aren’t a wine drinker may sound like a lot, but ask wine lovers.  I promise they finish the bottle most of the time).  I went several days without a single drink last week.  And nope, didn’t sit around thinking about it or anything.

I day drink mimosas on the weekends and when I’m on vacation at the beach.

99% of the time, I am drinking at home with my guy, not driving around like an idiot.

I spring out of bed early every morning, pour a cup of coffee, and join a productive society.  Sometimes (like once or twice a month) I have a single watermelon shandy while I work during the kids’ nap time.  It’s usually dinner time or later when I want a little low carb margarita or glass of rose.  Sometimes I have a single refreshing watermelon shandy while I work during the kids’ nap time.

I drink so slowly that Stuart often teases me about it.  It can take me 6 hours to finish a bottle of wine.

When you see pictures on social media of my drinks, you are seeing a small slice of my life.   You know what, I put my life out there and live wide open.  I overshare.  Drinks are pretty and to be honest, they get a lot of likes and comments, particularly on Instagram.  I am building a successful blog brand, so these things matter to me.

But I can promise you this – you are SURROUNDED daily by people who quietly drink at home, some of them far more than me.  It may be your pastor’s wife, your dentist, your kid’s teacher, your stylist, your elderly neighbor.  They just aren’t blasting it on social media.  I know this, because I hail from a small southern town in a dry county and everyone from my church and high school were lined up at the county line every pay day.  They would hide their faces, never making eye contact.

Above all, know these things:

  • I am in the healthiest relationship of my life and we pretty much pay the power bill at Total Wine.
  • My children are really fucking happy, well fed, and loved.  They are, however, really embarrassed by my kitchen dance moves after just a single glass of wine.
  • I run a successful business and my team and I love to trade drinking gifs since we all love our wine.
  • I am in amazing health.

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I opened myself up for criticism by participating in the sarahah hype and I LOVE honesty.  I just wanted to point out that much like OCD, anxiety, and depression, terms associated with alcoholism are overused and thrown about casually.

Know what the fuck alcoholism is before you accuse someone of having an issue.  And if you are truly concerned about me, talk to me about it openly.  I will be happy to invite you to my home so you can see what my life is actually like.

 

 

 

 

Week In Review: Ashley

Heeeeey Guys! Happy Monday Morning. 🙂 Thanks for coming back to see what we’ve been up to the past week.

Let’s see. Wednesday I was off work. My dad (or more commonly known as Ppop…or PopPop ..these days) decided to come get Coop for the day. That left me and Sophie alone for a girl’s day with Aunt Grace. 🙂 🙂 Sophie took a morning nap, and Grace came over. So she and I got a little alone adult time to have a conversation that wasn’t continually interrupted by a toddler or baby. 😉 We just hung out and talked while I spent a long and leisurely amount of time applying my makeup. Around 12:30 I checked on SoSo – and she was already awake! So we headed to Newk’s for lunch and then to Maurice’s and Target. Coop came back later that afternoon, and we just had a typical night after that.

Friday night I had a kid free evening. I got to spend  some more time with my Seeester. We did Chili’s for dinner and drinks. She hosted a bridal shower this weekend – so, after dinner we went back to my house and foraged my decorative household goods hoard collection for some things that she could use to decorate the room with.

 

Saturday afternoon the kids and I lounged at my parents house. The weather was so eery and gloomy and SUPER windy most of the day. Despite that it was actually a nice day to be outside. Late that afternoon the bottom fell out. We’d gone to check out the house my brother is in the process of buying and ended up getting caught in the downpour as we were leaving to head back home. Cooper stayed the night with his Grammy and Ppop Saturday night while Sophie and I headed home.

Race Track contraption that Ppop helped Coop build.

She slept amazingly that night. Like…from 8:00 pm to 9:00 am. It was great. Because I’d had a couple of glasses of wine that night and didn’t go to sleep until 12 myself. Haha

AND thanks to the heads up from Grace, I found out Downton Abbey is on Amazon Video (for Prime Subscribers)!! I’ve never watched it, but I have been wanting to for forever – but I didn’t have access to it…you know besides downloading it..and I don’t have time for that. 😉 So anyway, I may or may not have watched it Saturday night…and Sunday morning. 

A little glimpse into Cooper’s life while he stays with Grammy and Ppop. 😉 Cracker Barrel breakfast….Walmart trips with powder donuts…and some relaxing coloring time.

Yes, I am about to include a picture of my child on the potty. Sophie is a year and a half old – and she’s showing interest in going potty. So, I’ve started to put her on it when she asks. Because – training Coop has been such a bitch…I figured why not get a head start. Especially while she’s interested and does it willingly.

Sunday, Sophie and I headed back to my parent’s house around noon. We picked up Grammy and decided to take a spontaneous shopping trip to Hattiesburg. Cooper’s birthday is next weekend, so I thought I would look for some things for him. Also, I just wanted a change in routine and scenery for the day. 🙂 We ended up at the mall – and spent a couple hours just browsing. I did find a cute new outfit for Coop, which I’m sure he will very much appreciate. 😉 I feel so uninspired to buy him toys. I feel like he has way too many.

We stayed later than usual at my parents. Sophie was over being in the car. She pretty much cried the entire hour back home while we drove from Hattiesburg to Gulfport. So that was fun. I decided to chill at my parents and let her get out and stretch her legs. We ate dinner there and headed home around 7. I have to say, here, how much I love longer days. I don’t feel like we have to rush to get the kids in, because it will be dark soon.

That night we got home – the kids played a little…and then it was bath and bedtime! Now, I’m in bed by 8:30 – ready to call it a night. 😉

Getting some baby love from my girl before bedtime. She gives the best kisses….when you catch her in the right mood. 😉
Hope you guys had a fantastic week! What were y’all up to?